A Letter to My Future Self: You Matter Too

My Dearest Future Self,

I need you to hear this from the deepest corner of my heart: you matter. Standing here, at the gentle intersection of our past and our future, I see clearly who we've been, who we are right now, and who we long to become.

Throughout our life, we seldom placed ourselves first—not because we didn't long for or deserve care, but simply because no woman around us ever showed us how. Our mothers, grandmothers, and generations of women before silently taught us to care for everyone else first, whispering "We are fine," even when exhaustion, pain, or sadness filled their days. We internalized their quiet sacrifices and learned to silently endure, rarely voicing our own discomfort or struggles.

When we entered new families as daughters-in-law, the unspoken expectation remained the same: our own well-being was secondary, quietly waiting in the background. Then, motherhood further cemented this instinct. It felt natural, unquestionable, even sacred, to put our children first. We willingly placed their needs, their dreams, and their appointments ahead of our own, barely realizing we had completely faded into the background of our own lives.

I'll never forget the moment when my doctor urged me to prioritize my own health. I hesitated, instinctively. My child had an appointment waiting; another needed my watchful presence. I automatically pushed myself aside again. But the doctor's words startled me, stirring something deeply buried inside: "You are important too." The truth in his words felt foreign, almost uncomfortable. How strange that taking care of ourselves could feel so unnatural, almost wrong?

Reflecting now, these moments of clarity pierce through my heart. How long have we neglected ourselves, silently bearing burdens we never should have carried alone? This realization hurts, yet it's necessary for healing. So, moving forward, I implore you—break the cycle. Allow yourself to step into the sunlight of your own love and care. Teach future generations, your own children, the beauty and necessity of self-priority, of valuing themselves and their own needs, as much as they value those they cherish.

Remember, the world asks us to give endlessly, and giving is indeed beautiful. But don't we deserve to receive that same love, tenderness, and compassion we so freely give to others? Self-care is not selfishness; it is self-respect. It’s an acknowledgment of our worth.

Free yourself from guilt, nurture your own heart, honor your own dreams, and remember every single day: you matter profoundly.

Hope you finally will not feel uncomfortable when reminded to put yourself first. Hope you make this change, passing it on to the next generation. Hope you embrace the love you've endlessly given to others, for yourself as well.

With endless love, compassion, and hope,

Your Past Self